You’ve Been Adopted: The Family Of God

This doesn’t apply to everyone, but there are quite a few Christians who have challenging relationships with their families. It can make you feel like an emotional orphan who doesn’t really belong anywhere or to anyone. However, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Believers have been adopted into the family of God, and they belong with Him forever.

The Desire To Belong

It’s 3:00 P.M. in my hotel room, and I am due to check in at a Christian ladies retreat in an hour and a half. I put my bags down, check for a hidden attacker (thanks, true crime shows), hang up my dressy clothes, and then I look in the mirror. The early morning wake-up, four-hour drive, and my genetics aren’t doing me any favors. The women I’m about to see are leaders in their churches, and they’re put together. Meanwhile, my makeup is “meh,” and I look like an old shirt pulled out of the laundry basket.

Take a quick nap, have a small coffee… Relax before you head over. Always one to deny myself self-care, I shake off my own good advice and reach for the makeup remover. I start over the entire process of getting ready. If I look put together and like an actual adult, then I’ll fit in with these women.

At 4:30 P.M., I’m in the lobby of the dining hall we’re meeting at and making small talk. An introvert’s worst nightmare! But I do what I can to belong. I really want to belong.

This played out five days ago.

Looking For A Family

I probably sound a little neurotic. Maybe a lot neurotic. Without getting too deep into it, my family of origin and I are not close. I’m the only born-again Christian, and I’m not a very high priority for them. Divorce, death, remarriage, physical distance, religious differences, and few similar interests make deep relationships difficult to cultivate. I am O.K. with this situation because I have to be, but I feel the absence of a healthy family dynamic. I want a family in which I truly belong. Doesn’t everybody want people to love them and enjoy spending time with them?

I forget, though, that I already have that. Whoops. Silly me. I didn’t need to fix my makeup, adjust my clothing, or mess with my hair until it looked “right.” I was a Christian woman entering a retreat with dozens of other Christian women. For all intents and purposes, I was at a family reunion. Sisters came together to catch up, laugh, cry, pray, and edify one another. No matter what my earthly family may be like, I have a family through Christ. I neglect to acknowledge that truth far too often. I’m especially guilty of this when my earthly family is causing me more disappointment than usual.

I’m Adopted Into The Family Of God!

I have so much family that it’s a little embarrassing to admit I still feel like an orphan on occasion. I mean, how can I have so many spiritual mothers, father, brothers, and sisters in Christ yet find myself forgetting it? Sometimes, I guess I’m just a dope.

The last year alone has offered me opportunities to grow closer to many members of the church I attend through serving in ministries together such as VBS, youth programming, the Christmas program, choir, etc. And our prayer meetings and home fellowship groups (think: small groups) have allowed me to know my church family in a deeper and more authentic way.

Our family of God isn’t just in our local church, though our deepest relationships with other believers tend to exist there. I have also found Christian family in my community through other pastors’ wives, connecting with women from other like-minded churches, and attending ladies’ retreats in my area. Just this morning, I received a text from a woman I’ve become friends with after meeting at a ladies’ retreat. She asked about some significant events coming up in my life in order to pray for them. For those of us who have a distant relationship with our earthly families, these connections fill the void left by our blood relatives. The family of God steps in where biological family has left much to be desired.

I resisted closeness with the Church early in my walk with the Lord. It was unfamiliar and seemed safer to keep my distance. Seventeen years later, I can’t picture a world in which I am not surrounded by this adopted family of God.

“But My Earthly Family Is Wonderful”

Congratulations, you have an abundance of loving, healthy, and meaningful family connections. That’s wonderful, but that doesn’t mean, as a born-again Christian, that you haven’t been adopted into the family of God.

“But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.”

John 1:12-13

No matter what kind of earthly family you come from, you are a child of God when you’re saved. That’s good news for you folks with great families, and it’s also a huge blessing to those who don’t have a father on earth (or one who doesn’t do right by them). We all have a perfect Father in God.

And, as difficult as it is to believe, as adopted sons and daughters, we also have the honor of being co-heirs with Christ.

“But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, ‘Abba! Father!’ So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.”

Galatians 4:4-7

“For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sonsof God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, ‘Abba! Father!’ The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.”

Romans 8:14-17

Does The Family Of God Matter?

Churches spend a lot of time talking about the family of God, and it’s not some ploy to encourage church membership or increased giving. There are real benefits to embracing your place in the family of God.

When we actively participate in our Christian family, we are discipled, mentored, corrected, prayed for, and encouraged to grow in our faith. We can use our spiritual gifts to serve the body, and we can be there to walk alongside our brothers and sisters in the Lord through all of life’s victories and trials. The family of God shares a purpose, serving the Lord and telling others about Jesus. And if you are living a life that goes hard after Jesus, you should feel a closer bond to other believers than most other people you’ll meet because you share one Spirit.

“There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call—one Lord, one faith, one baptism,one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.”

Ephesians 4:4-6

Final Thought

I hope you don’t feel alone or abandoned by your earthly family. It’s my prayer that you have a family filled with love and deep roots, but Christian, it isn’t the end of the world if you don’t. If you’ve been born again, you have a perfect Father who loves you more than any person ever could, and you have a family so big that you haven’t met everyone in it yet. Remember, you never have to feel alone; you have a place you belong. You’re part of the family of God.

Image courtesy of Joel Mott via Unsplash.