Christian Unity Is Not What You Think It Is

As the world around us develops deeper divisions, many Christians are calling out for unity. In fact, some make it sound as if unity should be the utmost priority for Christians…at any cost. This idea of Christian unity is equated with love and kindness. To those who know me, the fact that I whole-heartedly disagree with this sentiment comes as no surprise. Over the years, from those who don’t know me well, I have received a fair bit of flak for my refusal to stand in unity with everyone. I’ve been called divisive, unloving, without grace, and people on Facebook and in real life have “unfriended” me over it. I guess they couldn’t stand in unity with me. Ironic, no?

My issue is not with the idea of Christian unity. It’s biblical, and believers ought to strive for it. However, the standards for whom we have unity are unclear or plain wrong in a lot of Christian circles. Christians aren’t expected to have unity with everyone. In fact, hold on to your hats, we shouldn’t even stand in unity with people just because they identify as Christians. Christian unity goes far beyond titles. Besides, plenty of people call themselves “Christian” who reject basic biblical teachings. We better set the bar a little higher before we go walking hand-in-hand with people.

Christian Unity With Unbelievers

I hope this next statement is obvious to everyone reading this. We can’t have Christian unity with unbelievers. I say a lot of things that I believe are obvious, but I think this tops the list. Christian unity is among Christians. So, why even bring it up? Well, would you believe some Christians are defining Christian unity as Christians having unity with others, period?

Not many Christians will say they are defining Christian unity this way, but actions speak louder than words. We can see it play out in real life with this common defense: “Jesus was friends with sinners.”

Can Christians Be Friends With Unbelievers?

We need to take a detour here because this is where my message gets misinterpreted most. Not being in unity with unbelievers doesn’t mean you can’t be friends with them. I have been banging the get-out-of-the-Christian-bubble drum for years. Please, don’t avoid people because they aren’t Christian.

On the other hand, recognize that you can only be so close to someone who rejects what (well, Who) should be the foundation of your life. Jesus Christ. Y’all might like similar music, movies, and stores. They might be fun to spend time with and nice people, but they can never share unity in Christ with you because they belong to the world, not Him. Ultimately, our worldviews clash, and the Bible warns us about with whom we spend our time.

“Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”

1 Corinthians 15:33

Take heed, it is much less likely that you will pull your friends up than that they will drag you down. Boiled down, I’m just saying that an abundance of time spent with unbelievers can severely damage your spiritual walk, especially if you see yourselves unified together in some significant way.

Romance With Unbelievers

Logically, if we can’t have true unity with an unbeliever as friends, then we definitely cannot unite with someone who isn’t a Christian in a romantic sense.

I’ll concede that there are unequally yoked marriages that work. These couples are faithful to each other, love one another, and live happy lives. Nonetheless, you can have a functioning relationship while still not having real unity.

In my experience, I’ve never met a woman married to an unbeliever who was unbothered by the mismatched faith. As the years go on, she feels the distance that inherently exists between them and the tension when her faith interferes with his wants and plans. It affects everything from budgeting, parenting, to vacation planning.

The Bible also has something to say about being involved with unbelievers.

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?”

2 Corinthians 6:14

Clearly stated, right? Darkness and light can’t be united together.

“ You shall not intermarry with them, giving your daughters to their sons or taking their daughters for your sons, for they would turn away your sons from following me, to serve other gods. Then the anger of the Lord would be kindled against you, and he would destroy you quickly.”

Deuteronomy 7:3-4

This is a warning to God’s people in the Old Testament not to marry pagans. Notice the warning. God’s people will turn from Him and worship false gods when they yoke with idolaters. Folks, this stands for today, as well.

“ A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.”

1 Corinthians 7:39

Some Christians refuse to believe that God would not have believers marry unbelievers. But how about we look at First Corinthians 7:39? This verse gives widows permission to marry whomever they choose…only in the Lord. She must marry a believer. Riddle me this.

Would the Lord allow Christians to knowingly marry an unbeliever except in the case of widows? What sense does that make? Christians marry Christians because they, together, can display Christ’s relationship to the church (Ephesians 5:22-32), raise their children to know the Lord, grow together to be more like Christ, and serve the Lord as a family. None of that is possible when a Christian marries an unbeliever. Purposing to be unequally yoked in marriage is a refusal to obey God, and it turns marriage into a self-serving relationship instead of a God-serving one. Not to mention, it leaves the believer with divided loyalties rather than true Christian unity within the most significant relationship she has on Earth.

The Bottom Line On Christian Unity And Unbelievers

We can love unbelievers, befriend them, and serve them in a multitude of ways. However, we must keep in mind that we can never truly be in unity with them because we come from different worldviews. We acknowledge the Creator God and His authority over everything; Unbelievers reject what guides our lives.

Below is a small sampling of verses that describes the world and our place in it, making it clear why we cannot be in unity with it or the people of it.

“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.”

1 John 2:15

“We know that we are from God, and the whole world lies in the power of the evil one.”

1 John 5:19

“You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.”

James 4:4

“Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.”

Colossians 3:2

Christian Unity With Other Christians

Now we get to real Christian unity. As I’ve stated, that’s impossible to have with unbelievers because we have built our lives on the solid foundation of Christ while they have given themselves over to man’s ways. But what about Christians?

This is where Christian unity truly applies, and yet, I often refuse to have that unity. A popular example from my blog is Saddleback Church and Rick Warren. I have written about him and his church several times. You can find those posts HERE, HERE, OVER HERE, and THERE, too.

Rick Warren isn’t the only person with whom I won’t stand in Christian unity. I’ve written about a favorite in ladies’ Bible studies, Beth Moore, and I’ve mentioned Priscilla Schirer, Steven Furtick and Jackie Hill Perry, and Sarah Young. Each of these individuals is considered a leading voice in the Church by many Christians. Meanwhile, I, and plenty of others, disagree strongly with their theology, teaching of the gospel, and/or we doubt they truly know the Lord based on their teachings. So, should I have Christian unity with people I think teach a false gospel or twist God’s Word for holy Ted Talks?

Two Common Misunderstandings

I find that Christians have two common misunderstandings about Christian unity. First, they think that anyone calling herself a Christian must be one. That would be wonderful, but I fear it’s not likely. Our churches are filled with unsaved people, but everyone in attendance assumes they are born-again. God’s Word warns us about this.

“Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.”

Matthew 7:13-14

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’”

Matthew 7:21-23

You guys, it’s scary, but it’s right there in Matthew. Few, in an eternal perspective, will be saved, and there will be those who approach the Lord anticipating a welcome only to be cast out instead. So, don’t assume someone telling you she is a Christian means she is one. Dig deeper.

Second, believers mistake Christian unity for validating other Christians, despite any questionable behaviors or beliefs. Scripture is clear about the evidence of a true believer. We will know them by their fruits (Matthew 7:16). A good tree produces good fruit, and Christians display the fruit of the Spirit.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”

Galatians 5:22-23

Another important section of the Word lists some characteristics of those living without Christ and reminds us that believers should not resemble that list.

“Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.” (emphasis mine)

1 Corinthians 6:9-11

When someone calls herself a Christian but continues to live in a manner as seen in the verses above, I cannot and will not assume I can stand in unity with her unless she is teachable, accepts rebuke, and is repentant. I mean, we’re all works in progress, but we should be growing in our relationship with Christ and becoming more like Him.

The Bottom Line On These Misunderstandings

We can’t just assume someone is a Christian because she says so, attends church, or comes from a Christian family. We need to see evidence to feel confident we can be in Christian unity. Keep in mind, though, only God can truly know the spiritual condition of any particular person with certainty. Besides, it’s not our job to determine anyone’s salvation.

In real life, we see this all play out by investing in others, serving them, walking alongside each other through life with love, and growing in our own faith. If there are red flags, they will appear eventually. Then, you decide how you can encourage them and if you need to confront them on anything. Pray about it, and you’ll know what to (and not to) do.

Defining Christian Unity

I’ve spent a lot of time explaining why we can’t or shouldn’t have Christian unity with some people, but we need to know what Christian unity actually is to have it with others. I’ve already addressed the lie that Christian unity is a unity with all people, saved and unsaved. Also, I’ve pointed out that some people will say they are Christians, but sadly, they are not. So, as we see with unbelievers out of the church, we can’t have Christian unity with unbelievers attending church, either. Lastly, I mentioned there will be some Christians who are so removed from biblical living that it would be impossible to unify with them under the banner of Christ. All that leaves for us is figuring out what Christian unity is.

What Christian Unity Is Not…

1. Validating everyone’s beliefs and lifestyles

2. Compromising your faith to align better with other Christians

3. Assuming that you can yoke in ministry with someone because she “loves Jesus”

4. Determined by denominations, political affiliations, and group/organization memberships

What Christian Unity Is

Christian unity is when Christians can stand together as one guided by the Holy Spirit in pursuit of biblical truth and an understanding of God. All the while, they are united in love for the Lord and for one another. (Yes, we need to love the EGR [Extra Grace Required] folks, too.) In the end, Christian unity’s goal is to share the gospel with all the world and bring glory to God.

How can any of us have Christian unity, then, with someone who replaces the gospel with a social gospel, is divisive in church, seeks to diminish the glory of God, unrepentantly clings to a favorite sin, or forsakes serving and loving the Church to serve self or love the world instead? Christian unity is specific in what it entails, and we should continually pursue it rather than flee it or redefine it so that it better fits our preferences.

God’s Word on Christian Unity

“May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus, that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God.” (emphasis mine)

Romans 15:5-7

“I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call—one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.” (emphasis mine)

Ephesians 4:1-6

“And I am no longer in the world, but they are in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, keep them in your name, which you have given me, that they may be one, even as we are one.”

John 17:11

“For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit.” (emphasis mine)

1 Corinthians 12:12-13

“I appeal to you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and create obstacles contrary to the doctrine that you have been taught; avoid them.” (Emphasis added)

Romans 16:17

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (emphasis mine)

John 13:34-35

Final Thought

The conclusion one might come to is that Christian unity is only for a few of the spiritual elite or maybe even unattainable. For once, I’m going to leave the cynical outlook behind and take the more hopeful approach. Christian unity is explicitly encouraged and implied throughout the Bible, and it is something that comes with salvation and deepens through spiritual maturity.

Believers can and should seek out unity with other Christians, but they must also stand firm in the Word. Others will try to sway us to unify on questionable stances and unbiblical teachings (Ahem! Progressive Christianity. Ahem!) Don’t compromise on truth. Instead, encourage other Christians to return to obedience to the Lord, to love and serve others, to welcome believers into Christian unity, and to never stop sharing the gospel.

Have you ever been pressured to have unity with someone or something unbiblical because you are a Christian? Let us know about it!

Image courtesy of Hannah Busing via Unsplash.