Responding To Your Feedback: Part 7 (Criticizing Criticism)
Every so often I receive comments on my blog posts and emails from readers who want to share their input on what I have written. Although many are supportive and friendly, plenty of others are critical, mean-spirited, inaccurate, or some combination of those attributes. On occasion, I do not respond to emails or approve comments because I don’t see how the exchange could be edifying. All that said, I would like to acknowledge some of these comments and emails when it seems appropriate. “Responding to your feedback” posts will be written directly to the author, but I will keep the individual anonymous by assigning him/her a nickname.
The Comment For The Day…Are Y’all Criticizing Criticism???
There is not one comment today. Instead, I have gathered multiple comments from various posts that all appear to come from the same concern. That is, people seem to strongly dislike criticism. So naturally, these folks respond by criticizing my criticism.
I’m certainly not above criticism, but I can’t help but feel a sense of irony when someone criticizes me for criticizing a teacher, pastor, church, teaching, etc. Rule for me, not for thee, eh?
The most popular posts to encourage these kinds of comments are 3 Reasons Saddleback Church Fails the Gospel and You, Finding a Healthy Church: A Response to Sheila Gregoire and Beth Allison Barr, and Catholicism is Not Biblical Christianity. (You can find responses to many of these comments in my other “Responding to Your Feedback” posts.
Below I will share each common comment separately, but I will treat them all as if they have been written by the same author. Some comments are a combination of many that have been edited to make one cohesive thought for the purpose of this post. My imaginary writer will be referred to as “How Dare You” because that’s usually the underlying vibe these comments give off.
Responding To Your Feedback
Dear How Dare You,
I appreciate your concerns regarding Christian unity, love, and support. Also, I can respect your decision to share your thoughts on a public forum. That’s can be a risky decision. The trolls are always waiting to strike, after all.
The overarching theme with your comments is that criticism is bad and that we should always look for the good while ignoring the red flags. I think this is a naïve and dangerous mindset for a Christian. Let’s address some of your concerns.
Responding To Your Feedback: Point 1
Criticizing Criticism – “But The Community”
“Your criticism isn’t valid because the community at that church is wonderful!”
This just might be the biggest rebuttal I receive in response to any criticism I have about a church. The feedback reports a loving environment, warm welcomes to visitors, entertaining/engaging programs, and a general sense of belonging. None of those are bad things. As a matter of fact, one of the characteristics that drew me to our current church was the sense of community. However, some of the churches I criticize can only offer a fraudulent version of these attributes.
What is the community built around? Does the church plaster Jesus’ name on everything but draw the focus elsewhere? If so, that community is not about our identity in Christ. Here are a couple examples of what I mean.
Welcoming Visitors
My first pastor always referred our church to a spiritual hospital because he wanted the congregation to remember that our church was for those with spiritual needs. I’m personally thankful for that mindset because I walked into that building on May 3, 2009 as a spiritually dead woman in need of salvation. I wasn’t one of them, so to speak, but I was treated with respect and love. I was welcomed into that unashamedly Christian space where the pastor preached honestly about sin, godly living, and Jesus.
Some churches welcome visitors by looking like the world, though. An unsaved visitor will hardly realize they aren’t like the people around them and feel right at home. Sure, they should feel welcome, but they shouldn’t feel like they fit right in. If they aren’t Christians, then they don’t! They won’t know what they need if you make them feel as if they don’t need anything at all.
Programs
This is simple. If your program doesn’t point to Jesus, then it’s just entertainment, babysitting, fellowship, etc.
My church is currently in the middle of Vacation Bible School (VBS) as I write this. We’re playing games, performing skits I should be too old to be in, and creating hilarious memories. The kids are loving it all. However, that isn’t our focus. Nearly everything we do is part of the greater picture: leading the kids to Jesus.
When our VBS kids go home, they’ll remember competing to build towers after learning about the tower of Babel, experimenting with light bulbs to understand the importance of an intelligent designer (i.e., God) in order to bring things into order rather than chaos, and watching a character named Tiffany come to realize she can’t save herself and needs Jesus. Was there fun? Yes, but it was all for God’s glory and to share the gospel.
Does every church do that? No, you guys, they don’t. There are churches that focus on looking like a fun place to belong to because the goal is to increase membership.
Sorry, but that’s true. Thankfully, there are plenty of churches focusing on Christ, but don’t be fooled by big stages, lights, professional music, a crowded calendar of events, and a large staff. Those can be great tools if you have them, but they are no substitute for the gospel.
What Is Church For?
How Dare You, you might think a church is good because you enjoy the community, but that’s not what church is there for. If that’s all that’s important to you, then just join a social club. Church is a place to disciple other Christians, making them equipped to minister in the community. Love and belonging are a part of church membership, but it’s about Christ…not you.
Responding To Your Feedback: Point 2
Criticizing Criticism – Hurling Insults
“I hate you.”
“You’re ugly, fat, and an idiot.”
“No one cares, loser.”
“I’d kill myself if I were you.”
My husband and I jokingly refer to this as fan mail, but it really isn’t fun to receive. For one, it’s not very helpful. If I am wrong, that is no way to engage me in a meaningful conversation.
Second, How Dare You, you claim to be a Christian while you hurl insults at me in an attempt to hurt me or bully me. Your witness is going to be negatively impacted if anyone sees what you write. More importantly, you are revealing your own character. If what you say to people when you can hide behind the anonymity of the Internet is so unkind and vicious, then frankly, you have a character issue you should take to God.
Third, you’re not getting anywhere because bloggers, including me, often delete comments like these. We don’t put trash on our sites, and hateful comments and threats are trash.
Responding To Your Feedback: Point 3
Criticizing Criticism – “You’re So Divisive”
“You really shouldn’t point out problems with other Christians. It’s too divisive and bad for the Church. Just ignore them if you don’t agree with them.”
This is a prime example of criticizing criticism. How Dare You, you’ve accused me of being too divisive because I’ve warned others about false teachers, poor exegesis, the New Apostolic Reformation (NAR), LGBTQ+ agendas in the church, etc. Not to nitpick, but aren’t you calling me out with comments like these? Aren’t you being divisive by your own definition? (You are…)
I wrote a post two years ago explaining why I won’t apologize for calling out false teachers, and I still stand by it today. If you haven’t, give it a read.
Perhaps, the biggest takeaway from that post is the reminder that God has commanded us to be on the lookout for and call out false teachers (Romans 16:17-18; Matthew 7:15-20; Acts 20:28-29). We don’t tolerate bad teaching or wolves in our congregations, How Dare You. Rather, we boldly stand against those who pollute the gospel and biblical teaching.
So, no. I won’t just turn a blind eye. The teachings and beliefs that self-professed Christians identify with is incredibly important to the future of the Church. It might not make me popular or likeable, but I refuse to turn my back on God’s standard for the sake of getting along. That’s the least loving or Christian thing I could do.
Responding To Your Feedback: Point 4
Criticizing Criticism – “But That Ministry Has Done So Much Good”
“Sure, there are some problems with that pastor’s/teacher’s ministry, but so many people have come to faith through it. Why scare people away from getting saved?”
I think I have heard this most about Rick Warren. How Dare You, you seem to think that the people I have warned against have saved people. They didn’t. Not one. And no, I don’t care how many people Rick Warren claims he is personally responsible for leading to Christ and leading to vocational ministry.
In each case, God was at work. No one saves but Jesus Christ, and He doesn’t need Rick Warren, Beth Moore, or Bethel Church to get the job done. For instance, my husband was saved in a church with an unsaved pastor. A few years ago, after retiring, that pastor came to know the Lord as his Savior. (Amen!) Over his entire career he was a lost man leading a fundamental church in a rural community near a university. People were saved in his ministry, many were baptized, and his congregants grew in their faith. All the while, they were led by a man who had no personal relationship with Christ.
God used that ministry, but there was something off about it. My husband and I recognized it immediately. The teaching was shallow and overly focused on outward performance. Yet, God continued to save souls. The truth is, He didn’t need that ministry, but I wonder what that ministry could have been if it had a godly man at the helm.
Ultimately, no one would choose to be led and taught by a man who doesn’t have a deep understanding of the Scriptures and a legitimate born-again testimony, right?
The Church needs to pull the weeds when they are recognizable and cultivate the believers left to serve the Lord after the bad teaching and teachers have been removed. God’s plans won’t be stopped no matter the circumstances, but we don’t need to allow unsaved or dangerous teachers to influence the Church.
Responding To Your Feedback: Point 5
Criticizing Criticism – “You’re Attacking Me!”
“Stop saying I’m a bad Christian for reading that book. You don’t even know me! Everything you write is hateful, but you can’t stop me from reading books by this author. Who made you the judge?”
A term we use often in my family is “Captain-You-Planet.” I think it applies here. So, Captain-You-Planet…not everything is actually about YOU personally.
I don’t know if it’s a generational thing, but you seem to be easily offended and to take everything as if it was written to you. It’s as of you imagine me at home thinking up ways to pick on you.
I mumble quietly to myself, “How can I really get to How Dare You this week?” Inspiration hits as I remember that I saw you reading Beth Moore’s memoir while I was spying on you… All right. Back to reality, friend. This ain’t about you.
Allow me to offer you a life lesson that will be essential to success in this life. Are you ready? Okay, here it is. People are allowed to see things differently than you, and they can share those thoughts with others. Your emotional reaction to their opinions and beliefs holds no bearing on their right to speak their mind. Find a friend to talk it out with, seek counseling, or just ignore it. Eventually, I pray you can read something that is contrary to how you see things, honestly consider if you can learn anything from it, and then move forward without needing to cuss me out or write me a “correction” that looks more like a book chapter than a comment.
Final Thought
How Dare You, I think your intentions might be in the right place. Believe it or not, I sincerely dislike pointing out problems because I long for everything to be peaceful and, well, easy. And saying unpopular things and offering criticism isn’t exactly what I would call easy.
However, the things that you think we should let slide and ignore carry much more weight in the Church than you realize. It’s incredibly rare for a generation to slide into unbiblical teaching or liberalism and then see the next generation snap back to biblical teaching and set-apart living. More likely, we witness a slip away from God’s Word and a drift toward man’s ways. Don’t believe me? Think about the people of Israel in the Old Testament. They constantly drew close to God, then embraced sin, and turned back to God again. And around and around they went.
My encouragement for you is to stop criticizing criticism and to use a discerning eye while considering it. Not all criticism is valid, but you’ll have to accept some of it if you truly want to avoid false teaching. But then again, do you?
Everyone else, what else would you say to How Dare You?