My Honest and Unfiltered Reasons for Homeschooling

I am homeschooling for many reasons. It’s for prestige, and I glory in all the comments I receive about how beneficial this form of education will be for my children. I educate at home because nothing makes me, an introvert, feel more comfortable than the moment the people around me realize I’m one of those moms. I homeschool because it’s easy. So, so easy.

Then I wake up and face reality. Homeschooling is not a life of prestige or being on the receiving end of unsolicited affirmative opinions. As for those moms… I’m pretty sure “those” is not a compliment. Admittedly, I might be doing this whole thing wrong, but “easy” is not often an adjective I use to describe homeschool. I think if I focused strictly on what home education looked like on paper, I’d stop the whole thing and put my kids on the next big yellow bus I see. This entire endeavor must look like utter foolishness. I’m home all day with 5 children from 9 years old all the way down to a rambunctious toddler. C’mon, you know that’s a rough day, and I’m living it every day. All year. Every year.

Know Why You Homeschool

Early in my homeschooling journey I came across advice that has stayed with me ever since. Know why you homeschool. Days will come that push you to the edge. You’ll be living out every it-will-be-funny-one-day meme you saw on Facebook about parenting struggles. You’ll look with disappointment at your messy home, your dirty dishes, your to-do list, your shrinking bank balance, the spit-up on your shirt, and the reflection of that exhausted woman in the mirror. Doubt will creep in about your choices and yourself. You may even doubt God’s provision for your homeschooling. You’ll hear a whisper. You’re not meant for this. It’s too hard. What’s the point in trying anymore? Send them to school. It’s better for them there.

Dear, you need a response to these lies. Yes, it’s hard, but God has called believers to train up their children (Proverbs 22:6). Just because God has told you to do something does not mean that it will be easy. It doesn’t mean it won’t require sacrifice. And no, my children are not better off in a school that usurps my parental authority, pushes agendas that are starkly against the God of the Bible, and indoctrinates children into the religion of human secularism.

Know why you homeschool. You’ll be pressured by family, friends, strangers (Seriously, mind your own business, right?), your district, and/or your spouse. Sometimes, disturbingly, even your church will try to dissuade you. It can wear on you over time and make you susceptible to doubt and dissatisfaction. Don’t let it. Instead, know why you homeschool. Your reasons may be different than mine, but hold on to those reasons. Remember why you started down this path, and don’t forget where you want to end up at the end of the journey.

Here are my reasons for homeschooling (in no particular order):

1. The Kids

I can hear the angry mob already, but let me explain. Although there are plenty of wonderful children in schools of all kinds, there are also children I want nowhere near my kids. The images, language, and behavior that I shield my children from is readily available on nearly every device in the school setting. It takes but a moment for my six year old to have his innocence stolen from him in the form of pornography on a classmate’s phone. Can this still happen in the neighborhood, at church, or at homeschool co-op? Admittedly, yes. But you know what? My husband and I have significantly more control over who our kids befriend and the level of supervision in those settings compared to in a school. There’s also the issue of bullying. Again, that’s possible elsewhere, but I don’t want to leave that in the hands of the school.

2. The Teachers

You read that right. I said it. It doesn’t mean all teachers, though. Having worked in public schools, being related to teachers, and being married to a teacher, I can attest to the existence of many gifted, kind, selfless teachers out there. I would even venture to suggest that the majority of teachers fit that description. At the same time, we are seeing numerous reports from around the country of teachers who are sexual predators, verbally abusive, and/or physically abusive to students. Also, some teachers are working with strong agendas in their classroom. Agendas that I want my kids to have nothing to do with. Not to mention, teachers are in crisis these days.

Where I used to live, in Illinois, there are currently more openings for teachers than applicants. Why? The job is awful! The pay is laughable for the amount of work the teachers put in throughout the year. The amount of testing and pressure from administration is overwhelming, and I believe many teachers are being robbed of their desire to truly teach because they are pushed to prepare for the testing. In my eyes, this is not a healthy place to send my kids. It might not even be a healthy environment for many teachers.

3. The Curriculum

Listen, I’m not going to go on and on about Common Core and how it misses the mark with age appropriateness. I also won’t drone on about how I’m a conservative Christian and schools are adding material to the curriculum that I find questionable. I won’t bore you with the fact that curriculum is more a business about lining pockets than serving students’ best interests. It’s all been said a million times before, but it still makes me recoil from public school.

4. The Government

I’m one of those weirdos who wants to shut down the Department of Education. Education is a state issue, so I’m left scratching my head and asking, “Why does this exist?” My guess is that the answer to the question lies somewhere inside some guys’ bank accounts. Besides, the federal government involving itself in my children’s education feels a bit nanny state. It’s like the invasive mother-in-law who won’t let you parent and won’t go home. (Note: My mother-in-law is nothing like this. She’s actually quite delightful.)

5. I’m the Parent

School begins usurping your parental rights at the very beginning. Oh, you feel like vacation in October would be fun? Too bad. The school says you can’t. But the plan was to tour New England and visit historical sites as an educational vacation? Nope! Truant! You wanted to know what sort of sex ed curriculum your child would receive and an option to opt out? Hmmm. That will depend on your district… It’s possible none of this is applicable in your life. One day, however, you may find your child has been taught something is true that is wholly against your beliefs. Do you think your son or daughter will believe you or his or her teacher? This scenario will play out in the classroom throughout childhood until eventually you don’t know anything (according to your child).

Have you ever wondered why most kids rebel against their parents and often think their parents are idiots? I theorize school has a lot to do with it. Parents are placed in a position subordinate to the school. They need permission from teachers to pull their own kids out of class. They can’t help their kids with the homework because it has to be done the right way, not the way mom and dad know. And frankly, teachers are spending much more time with students than parents spend with students. The role of parent diminishes, and suddenly, you discover you’re co-parenting with your child’s fifth grade teacher. Nope. That’s not for me. My children are mine, and the only other person with real input into childrearing is my husband.  

6. My Children

My children, like all children, have individual strengths and weaknesses. Those cannot be addressed effectively by any classroom teacher. There’s just too many students. I don’t blame anyone for it. The situation is what it is. Outliers don’t adequately get their needs met. At home, I can take care of those needs as they come up. I’m free to adjust our plans, curriculum, and schedule as I need.

7. Creating a Family Unit

Our children would be separated all day long if we sent them to school. Some siblings get along great, but so many siblings grow up as relative strangers who tolerate each other. So much time is spent at school, at activities, traveling to school and activities, and doing homework that families only have small pockets of time in the day to actually enjoy one another’s company. My husband and I desire to have a family that is close and wants to spend time together regularly. It is entirely possible to achieve this without homeschool, but why stack the odds against ourselves with extra challenges?

8. God Says So

OK. God doesn’t say, “Thou shalt homeschool.” He does, however, discuss the importance of wisdom and tells us to focus on His Word. It proves challenging to keep Christ in the midst of your education when your school keeps Him out and even teaches things as fact that contradict God’s Word. Or just leaves God out of His work… (Creation, anyone?) Anyway, here’s a few verses that convicted me about homeschooling.

Proverbs 22:6: “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Psalm 1:1-2: “Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.”

Proverbs 1: 2-8: “To know wisdom and instruction, to understand words of insight, to receive instruction in wise dealing, in righteousness, justice, and equity; to give prudence to the simple, knowledge and discretion to the youth—Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance, to understand a proverb and a saying the words of the wise and their riddles. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction. Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and forsake not your mother’s teaching,”

Proverbs 9:10: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.”

Proverbs 3: 5-6: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

Deuteronomy 6:5-7: “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”

Why Not Christian School

OK, but what about Christian school? I advise avoiding it, if possible. Obviously, the government shouldn’t be involved with the school’s functioning, but there is still an effect from the public schools. Christian schools often advertise that their teachers are certified just as public school teachers. This aims to entice parents who don’t want their children to “fall behind” the standards the government sets. I imagine this has to do with college, but I can’t speak for parents who see secularly certified teachers as a benefit in Christian school.

Here’s what I can say: If you want your children to have a Christian education and are willing to pay a lot of money to keep them out of public school, then why send them to a school that employs teachers with the exact same training and education as public school teachers? Tossing the name “Jesus” in occasionally and having a chapel time doesn’t make it Christian education if the teachers are coming from the same worldview as public school teachers.

A side note on Christian schools: Sometimes these schools are just last resort schools for kids who behaviorally couldn’t cut it in public school. Additionally, the students from Christian homes can also be terrible influences. A Christian home doesn’t mean Christian kids, and a family calling themselves “Christian” doesn’t always mean truly born-again. In some ways Christian schools can be more dangerous because there is a false sense of security that parents may have. So, the only way to ensure your children get the education you want is to be in charge of that education. I highly recommend checking out some videos by Voddie Baucham about homeschooling on YouTube. He presents some interesting and scary statistics for Christian parents.

Final Thought

I know homeschool is a radical idea to many. It comes with some heavy baggage in the form of assumptions, misnomers, stereotypes, and some unfortunately true stories. It requires being counter-cultural in a very real way. Sure, you can vote for the socially conservative candidate in your local election anonymously, but this is an in-your-face kind of Kingdom living that will invite criticism and demand explanations. I understand why a nonbeliever would not feel inclined to homeschool because the religion of secular humanism being taught in schools is agreeable to that person. But Christian, why are you sending your child into a spiritual battle zone? Why will you allow a school to keep your child for the majority of the day for the majority of the year? Would you reconsider what God would have your role to be in the training of your child? I pray you will.

Additional Information

Here’s some Voddie Baucham videos to get you started.

Check It Out

Are Your Reasons To Not Homeschool Actually Excuses?

Image courtesy of Jessica Lewis via Unsplash.